Predominantly Me..

feeling so tired every single day, stress every single min & scared every single click.. tired? worked ot everyday, even on a fri.. worked till 12am on fri where everyone has gone chilling out & me burying myself with work.. stress? whenever I stepped into the FC's room, meeting the MIS head & discussing the details with fellow collegues, I have to remz every single thing they say & summarise the stuffs in my head.. anything I'm not sure, I have to think hard, trial & error all the things.. there are so many formulas & figures to understand that every single figures I keyed in or saved, I have to be extra careful.. everything calls for precision & accuracy.. there's no time for slow work.. its either u work fast or work even faster.. everyday is a rush for deadlines.. I dont even have time for toilet breaks.. there is once when I'm so tired, I ended up going to the toilet to catch a short wink wink.. LOL.. nonetheless, indeed, I learnt a lot of new things & doing things I've nv done b4.. I really like the MIS head, she's so motherly & nice, patient with me & helping me with my doubts.. she's also very cheerful.. a lot of new faces in MIS, but they are nice as well prob except one who's always give me ans tt I didnt know how to tell my sup.. as for our FC, hmmm... she's nice when she's in a good mood.. nv stepped into her room when her face is black like charcoal or when she feel 'gek' as she repeated it no. of times on fri.. haa.. but i'm glad my sup & collegues are patient with me & willing to teach me step by step.. overall, amid the bz times, i'm happy there.. despite the changes & the new faces, know new friend & getting to know others better.. we had fun rushing thru deadlines & joking ard when we are so stressed up.. my sup was asking if my mum will ask me to tender my resignation with all the ot-s.. haa... on fri, when we were leaving, we saw a lady sitting in the lobby, wearing red somemore & she's there alone.. OMG.. i quickly asked the rest if they see what I see.. haa.. they all started laughing at me.. need their confirmation ma, its 12am leh!!! who wouldnt think its something you shouldnt be seeing.. haa..

before going for work, this has been what I wanted, to be loaded with lots & lots of work coz I hate to idle, to have nothing to do.. love the life of being busy & to have a tons of work to do but now thinking back, pursuing this kind of life is it worth it? everyday when I get back, dad & mum is already asleep & after bathing, head to sleep immediately.. haiz.. full of qns marks of what I want in life.. undecisive me.. to continue in the finance line, banking or to do smthg more meaningful? thinking of leaving, to see the world, to do smthg for the people.. prob go to the rural area.. not comm svc coz its not a svc but rather to know their life & to be part of them, to share their joy & sorrows.. there are happiness of simple life which we might not be able to understand.. living in the city with the burden of hectic life to earn money for essentials & wants, we walked too fast a pace to stop down to see the people around us.. sometimes feeling so tired & breathless, wished to get away.. wondering at times, whos true & whos fake.. to believe or not to? seen too much of how different a person can be & it is hard to comprehend human beings.. where in the world should I settle at? mum doesnt want me to work overseas coz it will be hard to see me.. i'll be labelled as a heartless daughter if I were to leave??

went MWH today.. its been a long time since I last went there.. had game session with them then celebrated sm's b'day... we played 'fishing'.. they had fun & we were feeling so hot picking fish for them.. haa.. after the session, we went vivo for dinner.. ate @ terra cafe, not too bad a choice.. I had lagsana, not incredibly nice but not too bad either.. then went shopping ard.. very tired & sleepy along the way.. fatigue setting in.. bought only all food stuffs to bring to office.. kept feeling hungry in office, esp since working into the night.. 25th may coming soon... wondering whats my fate.. haiz.. god.. please bless me..

Looking fwd to the GZ & HK trip... wanna have fun then a good rest b4 starting my last sem in school.. will def missed the days in the sch thereafter.. & may I get a hall stay.. I really need it..