starting to feel so stressful.. with all the tut qns allocated, assignments topics out & not forgetting sudden change of assessment freak me out.. prob lots of things changed & I'm feeling so lost with game & health.. Its the learner's prob? Haiz.. lots of deadlines to meet and my schedule is so packed.. hope I'll survive thru... now still brooding over if I sld take up the 4th yr.. been thinking a lot these days.. I am so tempted but the outcome is unpredictable.. what if I regret? My application for the waitlist is still not out.. I guess there wont be any good news.. Haiz.. why havent things been turning out right?

Another wk has gone & its 2 wks of sch.. time flies... as usual, there are tons of readings forever piling up & I have yet to finish all of them.. went down to orchard today to collect my event pack for nxt sat event.. gg for my aerobics challenge.. wonder if my stamina is enuff to last for the full 3 hrs but def looking forward to it.. to sweat it all out & vent off all steam & frustrations accumulated in me.. signed up for lots of recruitment talks too.. the bad side is I gonna have to wear formal, so hopefully the scrafice is worthy, to understand better the co. I hope to get in but I know there are some which are beyond my reach..

with time closing in, wondering what field sld I be in, what kind of job will I hold & whats the future ahead like? hoping to search for jobs that are based overseas but I guess mummy will nv let me go.. even gg overseas trips will make her countdown everyday for my return, whats more if I wud to go for long term... Hmmm... see how first ba... [the earth will not stop rotating for anyone & its time for me to walk ahead & not abrupting the route, trying to grab every single bit of the past which I tot would return.. remembering what eunice said, I know its useless to try & be sad over it.. whats left is just a meaningless title...]

gonna zzZZzzZZ soon.. lots of readings waiting for me tml to complete & its gonna be a bz wk ahead again...

Attended my first lect for game theory & health econs.. for game theory, the lecturer is really nice.. been obsessed with korean lecturers ever since my metrics lecturer came into the pic.. like him, he's really nice & would make sure everyone of us understand but sadly, I understand nothing.. only catch a little bit & there but I'm feeling so lost.. only wished I can dropped the mod this moment or prob buck up the courage to go into the dean's room & pour out my worries.. I really need a private consultation with the lecturer... Its no longer lvl 1 or 2 but lvl 3.. Its chim beyond my comprehension... Haiz.. seem to be seeing dean's list students in the lect & I'm in the dean's invisible list but neither do I wanna fare so badly that I have to see him...

health isnt really bad but the lecturer just go on & on in a mono tone.. been day dreaming most of the time as I'm really tired.. didnt sleep well the prev night.. lots of thoughts flashing in my mind.. wondering whats bothering me so much... Its still lect 1 after today, the first ever lecturer I ever had who can teach lect 1 for consec 2 wks & not done yet.. good news or bad?? Haiz... to conclude.. sad sad day & my first to be attending lect w/o xm beside me but still alright, I've others with me.. it takes some time to get used to it.. wondering if xm feeling the absence of me?? haa... we are suppose to stick together like super glue, to hug & sink together but all thanks to my failed appeal.. I need lots of ice-cream & choco to tide thru this sem... think I'll get fatter sooner or later.. only indulging in these 2 can make me forget the unhappiness but a temp measure only coz I'll still have to sit for the exams..

After lect, went window shopping with sarah, xm & sh before settling down for dinner.. its to make up for sh's b'day as my wk is really a bad one & everyone having diff tt... we ate chicken rice then shop again... the others are too full to eat dessert thou I still have stomach for it.. Heez.. kind of guilty, I'm lagging behind badly for my readings.. gonna buck up if I wanna do well.. Haiz.. gg sch earlier to study tml.. starting to dread gg for thurs reproductive health.. the medical terms are really diff to understand.. Haiz.. why are all the mod this sem so chim for me... gonna zzZZzzZZzz soon so tt I ve all the concentration to clear the pile of readings & tut...

Finally my tt is finalised!!! but xm will hear me grumbling for the whole of this wk.. Heez.. I know xin ku le ni but I'm sure you will understand my wu nia.. guess you dont have much of a choice.. tsk tsk.. you are my only shu gu person... Its been a super tense up week & def pissed off with the staff at the dept.. I'm just trying to know why did they do their work unfinished & all she did is pushed off responsibility.. super super super pissed off!!

but there's no way I can change the situation now.. hopefully I'll survive thru... its my final sem.. muz make the best out of it... its 8am class tml... Haiz.. think i'll end up feeling vry sleepy again... please let me have a break or i'll zzZZzzZZ... last wk was a torment, no break at all...

Woke up real early on sat to temple to pray pray... guess too much things happen these days.. going there helps to put my mind at ease.. went straight home after that & was caught in the rain.. ended up sneezing all the way thru after that... Slept a while before waking up again to go down to mwh.. its been quite some time since I last went there.. I guess its 1 mth+.. its handicraft session & we made fishes with them.. can see that they enjoyed themselves with the cutting & pasting.. but for us, its watching out for them, making sure they dont cut themselves.. its still raining when we ended our session.. went suntec for dinner.. ate at bian fu.. again i tried 2 chilli... OMG... its super hot for me.. was sniffing & sneezing thru eating... was nv a person who can eat spicy food... after dinner, we went to check out prices of washing machine for ej.. after which we went crystal jade to buy lao po pi... Haa... yeah.. finished our boxes of lao po pi & yet, we are there to buy some more.. but its nice & yummy nonetheless.. when we were brooding over where to head after tt, we fnally settled on dessert at 'ah chew'... I ate black sesame.. yummy.. it isnt tt sweet.. its home sweet home after tt.. was so tired.. I slept the min my head touch the bed...

tml I'll be gg down to econs dept for my appeal case.. wish they will give me whatever I appeal for.. May luck be with me tml.. God.. please bless me..

To think that I actually started crying at the bus stop.. Haiz.. Luckily didnt went out dinner with xm & all or bao & all, if not, think I'll start pouring out like no other pple biz.. it might seem nothing to cry, just go back to appeal again but didnt have a gd experience there when I was appealing for tut.. Plus, I've beginning to get overly worried & paranoid over my mod as days passed.. brooding over if they will give me what I need & its not a matter that they didnt give me what I want now, but they missed out giving me another.. I need 2 but I only got 1.. Its just a breakdown for me.. feeling so tired from all these.. I still have to go through a tutorial balloting & I'm w/o 1 more mod now.. haiz... but still have to rank whatever I have now.. Isnt a good day for me.. feeling so so so sucky...

Haiz... I havent even got the chance to place my bid & it exceeded what I have in my p-acc.. Its so stressful having to do this before every new sem.. having to worry over how many pts I have, is it enough to bid for all my mod & are all the mod exam dts spread out evenly.. have to work doubly hard this sem.. need to conquer my worst fear, metrics.. Its a higher level and def harder as well.. waiting for appeal session to start... (**thurs.. pls come quick...)

Tml is the start of my sch life again.. 8am class for a start & I'll have to wake up before tai yang gong gong does.. wish I can sleep early tonight.. so used to sleeping late & I had too much sleep for the past few days after my trip.. tml will be the day I'll determine if I can take metrics.. will be having a 4 hrs break too.. wonder how to pass the time when there are no tut to do.. can't wait for tml to come.. will be gg to watch jay's movie!! yeah!! will be watching with xm, sarah & shidah.. plus.. I wanna eat at arts canteen.. finally, the renovation are finished.. I missed my tau hua.. yummy...

May tml be a good day & to meet great lecturers...

Its been a wk since I'm back.. been busy cleaning up my room to prepare for the new sem.. cleared off all the tb from last sem & most importantly unpacked all the bags that I brought home from hostel.. Haa.. Its been there for like 3 mths and I'm super lazy to unpacked them.. There are just so many notes & tb to arranged & putting all the clothes back to my wardrobe.. Finally did them all in 3 days..

Sch starting tml.. 3 mths of holi is my last & it contained my saddness & happiest times.. Let it all be buried and start the new sch term afresh.. This sem isnt really a good start.. Still short of 1 econ mod plus I have no choice but to include metrics II for next sem.. cried while studying for it last sem.. wondering if I can take it.. 3 mths of holi seem to return all my metrics knowledge back to lee jin & xiao mau.. have to wait until rd 3C ends before I can appeal for my last mod.. hopefully I can drop metrics & they will allow me to choose another mod.. I really dread taking metrics and its designed for honours student.. what do I have to compete with them? Haiz haiz... after bidding for reproductive health, now becoming worried if I'll be able to catch all the medical terms.. Its offered from the medical faculty & I'm def a medical idiot.. May everything goes well for me..

Its my final sem in sch, I'll def treasure the final days as a student & being in the place which I have been dreaming for since sec sch days.. It will be working days from then on... mummy been counting down the days to my grad, start earning money then she can finally rest her mind & fulfilled her responsibility.. tues will be the start of my sch life!! May I meet great lecturers & be blessed with intelligence & luck.. A prayer to for my application for waitlist for my hostel...

Finally finished my updates on GZ & HK... Its been a fun & happening trip.. esp the last 2 nights is the most memorable to me.. had most fun & fright on the last 2 nights...

Hong Kong...
05/08/2007(Sun) - Day 9



This is the airport I'm left strandled at.. Haa.. woke up at 7.30am to eat breakfast before checking in one more time... there's no way we'll missed our flight at 11am.. Haa.. We were at the gate very early so as not to have any delay again.. We are finally on our way home!!!